Here is why I'm a terrible mother, reason #33:
Last night when I got home from work and other things,* I finally ate dinner, got changed, and got ready to watch some television. Tori usually just nurses and dozes after 8pm so I was really looking forward to watching some sitcoms and the return of Heroes and Studio 60.
Just as Heroes started, Tori decided that the thing she wanted to do most in the world was lie across Mommy's lap and groan. At top volume. Luckily we have DVR (ghetto Tivo) and I paused the show and patiently waited for the groaning session to end. She wasn't discontent, at all--just enjoying practicing her vocalizations. After about ten minutes I started trying things to distract her; singing, bouncing, tickling**, blowing in her face, groaning with her but louder, everything. Nothing worked; she was relaxed enough to not want to do anything other than groan. After twenty minutes, I finally yelled down the basement stairs to Charlie (where he was on the computer in his office--hey, the basement's finished! I don't chain him to a radiator or anything) and asked him if he had any suggestions about stopping the groaning.
He laughed, and suggested I try hitting CTRL, ALT, and DELETE at the bottom of Tori's feet to see if that would reset her. Helpful guy, my husband.
So I just waited it out. Impatiently. Eventually, she started nursing and I was able to catch up. But I was supremely irritated. That's why I'm a bad mom--here I am, getting yet another precious memory of my amazing daughter, and I'm all like, "just shut up already so Mom can watch her stories."
Sigh. I need chocolate. Fucking diet. Fucking migraines I get from chocolate now.
Hmmm.... PMS?
* Other things was my weightwatcher meeting. I lost one pound. One measly fucking pound. Of course, that makes a total of nearly seven pounds in two weeks. Why am I bummed?
** Just in the last few days has Tori become ticklish. On only her left side. Ah, the laughter...
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I need some advice. First off, Tori is getting too big for the infant car seat. I am way too lazy to actually do any research about the best baby-to-toddler car seat, so just tell me what to get. You know, I know you do.
Secondly, one of the artists I represent in my shop was sweet enough to bring me a rather extravagant gift certificate to a local (very chi-chi) spa. So, what should I get?
Classic Hot Stone Massage
Raindrop Therapy Massage (involves "aligned" essential oils)
Deep Tissue Massage
Any one of a variety of silly facials
Rejuvenation Peel
or... a combination of small things like an eyebrow wax and a pedicure
I need something that will take the place of chocolate. Heh.
Thanks in advance. And, for your viewing pleasure--new pics of Tori.
