The year's final season of blogging conferences is fast approaching. BlogHer is just a few weeks away. If you aren't a blogger, you don't care. In fact, if you aren't a blogger, this is the time of year -- the approach of BlogHer -- where the normally staid and smart, savvy bloggers you love to read start becoming crazed fan girls constantly squeeing about seeing each other, competing for party invites, and buying ridiculously uncomfortable shoes that are also very, very cute.
So, unless you are one of the squee-ers, well, you won't care about this post.
But if you are...
This is my personal guide to how to get through your first big blogging conference. I'm writing this because twenty people on twitter asked me to.
Ready? Alright then.
My first BlogHer was in 2008, in San Francisco. I had no idea what to expect, although I thought it might be a bit similar to some of the sobriety conventions I've been to. And in a way, it is. BlogHer begins on a Thursday night (earlier for some folks), and gets into full swing on Friday morning. Breakfast is served, there is usually a major presenter or discussion during the first gathering of everyone in the big room, and everyone is fairly quiet. Then you typically break off into smaller sessions in the other rooms. Eventually you gather again for lunch, then the afternoon is again the smaller sessions, and then an end-of-day gathering in the main room.
Then? Then the parties begin.
There are, first and foremost, the BlogHer official cocktail parties. These are fun, and usually involve enough appetizers to kind of build a meal. Then the other parties start. The brand parties (meaning, a particular brand throws a party for BlogHer attendees, usually all invited and they are not open to everyone). Then there are parties that involve the "famous" blog sites, the ones where everyone scrambles for an invite. No one throwing the parties is an elitist, but everyone who doesn't get an invite thinks they are (really, they are just limited by budget and don't care who comes, but it's still first come first serve).
So how do you make sure you get the most out of your BlogHer (or, really, any blogging conference) experience? Here are my tips.
1. Fuck the cute shoes. Seriously. Don't do it. Wear shoes you can stand in, walk through a hotel in sixteen thousand times in, and even pound the pavement in New York City in when you inevitably leave the hotel to see the sites in. And I've got news: NO ONE LOOKS AT YOUR SHOES, UNLESS YOU ARE ONSTAGE. Most years? I've worn my Keens. These. Yes, really. And you know what? I have never regretted it, not once. The women with the cute shoes? Walk around barefoot with bloody heels and carry their shoes in their hands. Yep. Not me! I go to bed with tired but happy feet.
2. Plan ahead. Get the conference schedule and figure out what panels are must-sees for you. Then...
3. Don't overschedule! Be flexible. You never know what might happen; someone you admire might ask you to join them for lunch, right during that panel you were excited about. You might find yourself standing for an hour in the lobby with someone you just met but simply cannot stop talking to. Or you might find yourself, as I did that first year, in the back of a room in an intense conversation with a young woman I'd never met before that was so amazing that I totally forget how badly I needed to pee. Blogging conferences are full of tiny, perfect little magical moments like that and you simply have to slow down enough to enjoy them.
4. Fuck the parties. Go if you want to go, don't go if you don't want to. If you didn't get an invite, who cares? Seriously. It really doesn't matter. I usually RSVP for everything, but sometimes? Sometimes I skip going to the party and go to a nearby restaurant with a dozen people I've just met and spend two hours talking and laughing my ass off. And you know what? It's just as good. No; sometimes it's actually better. The parties can be dark, loud, and hard to talk in. I usually pop in and out of parties because the lobby ends up more fun.
5. Fuck the swag. Honestly? The whole swag thing at BlogHer gets a bad rap. It has NEVER been the focus of the conference. Very few women get all excited about the swag. Seriously. Yes, sometimes it's nice. Sometimes? It's fliers and brochures, and not at all exciting. But you know what? The sponsors are the nice people that make the conference possible -- and affordable. It's nice to say hello, take what is offered and actually review it (and by review it, I mean, look at it, not write about it on your blog -- there is NO requirement to mention anything from the conference on your blog). But the truth is, there is a lot of swag. If you like it, and you want to keep it, you can get a lot of really fun stuff. So...
6. Prepare for the Swag. I travel light -- literally, I bring one carry-on suitcase and my messenger bag I use during the day at the conference only. So I usually don't have room for swag. Most of what is offered I don't take because I simply don't have room. If you are willing to pay to get the stuff home, well, bring an extra suitcase. Or better yet, find a shipping store near the hotel and ship the stuff home. This year? I'm taking the train, not a plane. So... I might be bringing an extra bag. I confess. I like free stuff.
7. The lobby/community areas are FUN. Seriously. Sometimes I just sit somewhere prominent and wait to see what cool folks walk by and engage them in conversation. I've ended up talking to the husbands of bloggers attending while they are wrangling the kids, folks from the media, brand representatives, and shy bloggers that are seeking a break from the hubbub. Some of my best memories of conferences come from those moments.
8. Bring your laptop. Seriously, don't think you can get by on a smart phone (you can, however, use a netbook if you are lucky enough to have one). You'll regret it. BlogHer is well-organized to handle women on computers. They usually have tables you can sit behind at each panel, plenty of charging stations, and no one -- literally, NO ONE -- will be offended if you are behind the screen. In fact, one of my favorite things about going to social-media related conferences is that half your conversations are held over your computer. I love not having to apologize for spending time online.
9. Bring a camera. You'll want the memories. Upload them to the Flickr group for the conference, post them on twitter -- but limit how many you put on your blog. Honestly, the post conference photos posts just make those that can't be there feel badly for what they missed. I know, I'm guilty of the photo post or two from a conference. So feel free to ignore this advice (I probably will), but know that it's true.
10. BLOGGERS ARE JUST PEOPLE. This is my most important point. The other bloggers? The ones you think are super famous? They are just people. They have their own life issues happening at any given moment, and they are trying to have their own awesome conference experience. Plus? Some of them are paralyzed by social anxiety. Some are freaked out about having to speak, and some feel like they just totally fucked up while they spoke. Sometimes they've got food poisoning. Sometimes they just had a tremendous emotional experience and need to have some quiet time to recover. Sometimes they've had too much to drink. Sometimes they get into an argument with a friend. Whatever it is, the moment you choose to approach a blogger you've admired from afar may very well be the worse moment of the weekend for her. So if the blogger you've loved forever is short with you, or doesn't gush back as much as you want her to, or simply walks by without responding to your hello -- whatever it is, IT IS NOT ABOUT YOU. It doesn't mean that the blogger is a bitch, or that she hates you, or that she's aloof. It simply means that she was not at her best at that moment or that it was too damn loud or she was too distracted to hear your hello. Try again later on in the day. Send her a tweet or an email. Try to remember that for some of us (no, I'm not calling myself a famous blogger, just a conference junkie) this is the only time we get to see each other. So if you see me hanging out with the same handful of people throughout the weekend, it doesn't mean I am part of an elitist "clique." It just means I am soaking up the joy and wonder and awesomeness of the women I spend most of the year only getting to talk to online. Again: IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU.
Okay. I think that's most of it. What about you? Do you have a specific tip you think will make the conference better for those that haven't gone before?
